


If I Die

by trinielf82



Series: C&R BSG AU [4]
Category: Cut & Run - Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 17:38:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2820626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trinielf82/pseuds/trinielf82





	If I Die

Ty pressed his forehead against the cool metal. He could not do this. Had no idea what he’d do if he went in there. Maybe he should just leave.

"Having second thoughts?"

He spun around at the familiar voice. Kelly looked at him, eyes somber. This was the most serious Ty had ever seen the man. But considering the men they both loved were on the other side of that door, locked up in the brig because they were fucking cylons, now really was not the time for smiles.

"I can’t fucking do this doc." He admitted "What if i try to…" The words stuck in his throat. kill them.

Ty didn’t say it out loud. He didn’t really have to.

"That’s still Nicko and Zane in there" Kelly said.

Did he really believe that shit? His best friend and his lover were both cylons. Really, how could the fucking universe be that cruel? It had been a real struggle for Ty to accept Emma as one of them. After years of cylon equals enemy being ingrained in them all, they’d all had to adjust to the idea that maybe the toasters really could choose to go against their programming. Emma had proven that time and time again.

But…Nick and Zane being revealed as one of the Five? He did not know if he could deal with that shit.

"What if they’ve been playing us this whole time Kelly?"

"No." Kelly shook his head "You saw their faces. I believe they didn’t know."

"But Owen…."

"Made his choice for whatever reason. That doesn’t mean Nick and Zane will do the same."

"How the hell are you so calm with all this?" Ty demanded. He was falling apart right now. He wanted to scream. Punch something or someone.

Kelly’s laugh was brittle “Calm? I’m fucking losing my shit here Ty, but lashing out isn’t really going to help anything. Move aside, I’m going in there. You comin’?”

Ty moved away from the door. Could he go in there without losing it? He really didn’t know. But as the door swung open he fell in behind Kelly.

Digger came alert as soon as they both entered, finger posed near the weapon that was casually draped over his thigh.

"You here to cause trouble?" his question was aimed at Ty.

Ty ignored his friend, his eyes on Zane who was watching Ty from behind the bars. Nick and Livi were watching him too, from their cells.

"Me cause trouble, never." Ty finally responded.

"You threatened to shoot my wife." Digger looked like he wanted to shoot him. A muscle was jumping in the man’s jaw. And his fingers were now tightly gripping his weapon.

Shit. He had hadn’t he? Threatened Emma.

"He was understandably upset." Kelly chimed in "Things said in the heat of the moment. He didn’t mean it."

Digger held Ty’s gaze “Oh i understand the shock. Trust me I’ve been there. So you get a pass just this once. But Grady? You ever threaten Emma again, shit will get real serious real fast.” 

Ty nodded. “Yeah, i hear ya.”

Digger stepped aside and indicated that Ty could move closer to Zane’s cell. So clearly they were going to have an audience for this. Ty supposed no one trusted him to be here alone with these two. Good. Because he didn’t trust himself right now either.

*******************

Zane remained silent as Ty stood in front the cell. His lover looked like he was barely keeping it together. Ty’s hands were at his side, clenching and unclenching into fists.

"Why didn’t you go with Becky?" Ty finally spoke.

"My place is here with you." Zane gripped the bars. Couldn’t Ty see that?

"She’s your wife"

"Yes, she is. but i thought she was dead. All this time…" So many shocks in one day. Zane wasn’t sure how he was still standing. To know that Becky was still alive, he wasn’t sure how to process that. Far less the fact that she was one of the final five, just like he was. And wasn’t that a double kick to the gut.

"So now what?"

Zane blinked at Ty. Ty’s eyes were devoid of it’s usual spark. The man looked so defeated. “I…I don’t know Ty.” he held Ty’s gaze “But you have to believe that no matter what i love you.”

"Ok"

"Ok? What the hell does that mean?"

Ty sighed “Take it however you like. Goodbye Zane” He gaze flicked over to Nick and Kelly before he turned his back on all of them.

"Ty? Ty wait! Please!" No no no. He couldn’t just leave.

Ty looked over at Digger “I’m done here” he said before he walked out the room.

Zane stood, clutching the bars, staring at the closed hatch door.

"He’ll come around." Kelly’s voice drew his gaze. But the look in Nick’s and Livi’s eyes probably mirrored his own feeling.

Maybe Ty would come around. But what if he didn’t. Then what?

*********************

Zane held out hope that Ty would come around. He just needed time to process everything. Hell they all did. But soon enough Ty would see he was still his old self right?

On the 6th day in the brig, Zane’s hope was waning. Ty had not come back.

Nick had gotten plenty visits from Kelly. Deuce had finally made an appearance on Day 2 to see Livi. They had all been visited by Emma and even the Admiral.

Admiral Burns was only interested in what they could do to help end this damn war. As long as three of the final five were on board the Sidewinder, no raiders had been deployed to attack. And Burns wanted to use that to his advantage.

"How’s Ty?" Zane couldn’t help but ask the Admiral.

"Grady’s keeping busy."

Zane wanted to press Burns for more information but the man was obviously not here for small talk.

"We’re going ahead with the plan. And i expect you three to help. And you Zane are going to get your wife on board."

That got his attention. “What are you talking about Burns?”

"Destroying the main resurrection ship. Raiders won’t attack the final Five. And this is the only way to show Grady you’re loyalty. You keep resurrecting and he won’t see you as anything other than his enemy. " Burns leaned in "but you destroy that ship and you two are on even footing again."

He would do anything to get Ty to see he mean it when he said he loved him. But what was to stop Ty from killing him once that ship was destroyed. There’d be no resurrecting after that.

He said as much to Burns. The man just shrugged “I don’t really give a shit Garrett. You don’t have a lot of options here.” He looked at the others in their cells. “None of you do. Get Becky on board with the plan or be flushed out the airlock. Either way we’re taking out that resurrection ship. It’s time for you to pick a side”

"I already did that by choosing to stay here."

Burns nodded “Good.”

"But here’s the thing." The plan forming in Zane head was crazy but they had to cover all bases "You’ll need someone on the inside. The minute we jump near them the resurrection ship will jump away."

Burns frowned “Zane…” the Admiral had clearly caught on to where he was going with this. “…you’re not actually suggesting…?”

"One of us needs to resurrect in that ship, and you only have a few options on board."

"Am i to take this as you volunteering for that role?"

Zane nodded. If Ty didn’t want him anymore, he may as well be of use to someone right?

*******************

Ty gaped at the Admiral.

He had been running on fumes these last days. Unable to sleep. So maybe he was hearing things too. Because what Burns had just said…

"Did he really say that?" Ty asked. "Or was this your idea?"

"He suggested it. The thought never crossed my mind Ty."

That asshole! Ty did not wait to hear whatever else the Admiral had to say. All that registered was Zane volunteering to resurrect on that fucking ship.

Ty barged into the brig. Ignoring Nick and Livi completely, eyes blazing as he stalked over to Zane.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" he growled. He didn’t give Zane a chance to answer "You have no idea what’s on that resurrection ship! No idea what’s going to happen when you wake up!"

Zane’s dark eyes bore into his “It’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

"Why you?" Ty demanded

"I would never ask this of anyone else. Emma has a husband and kid. Livi as Deuce, Nick has Kelly and i…"

Fuck you, you have me! Ty wanted to shout. but is actions had not really shown that had they? Ty was just so messed up inside. He didn’t really know how to act or feel. But the minute Burns had revealed Zane’s plans something in him had rebelled at the idea of Zane offing himself just so he could resurrect on that fucking ship, in enemy territory.

"This is a stupid plan" He said now.

"It’s happening. Why do you even care? You’ll be rid of me. It’s what you want right?"

Ty looked away, eyes falling on Livi who was watching the entire exchange. He knew Deuce had been to see her. God, he hadn’t even gone to his brother since this entire shitstorm had unfolded. He’d been so caught up in his own whirlwind of emotions. He’d go see Deuce as soon as he was done here.

He scrubbed his hand across his face and turned to face Zane once again. “I get to do it.”

Zane brow furrowed in confusion “Do what?”

"If anyone’s sending you back to that fucking ship it’s me. You don’t get to off yourself and no one else gets to either."

"Ty…"

"Promise me! You fucking promise me now Zane or i’ll shoot you right fucking now and get it over with!" Ty heard the tremble in his own voice, but he was beyond caring now. He was mad at Zane. Mad at fucking Becky for showing up. Mad at his fucking best friend for being a cylon.

He knew that was beyond their control. Even getting Zane to change his mind about the resurrection ship was out of his control. But fuck all that he could control when Zane took his last breath, and he fucking would. Just let anyone on this battlestar try to stop him. Technically it wouldn’t be Zane’s last breathe because he would resurrect, but there was no way to know if Ty would even see him again.

"I promise Ty."

The soft words were all he needed to hear.


End file.
